A few years ago, I went to my friend Nick's 40th birthday party.
As part of the celebration, he hired an improv comic, and us all they had to participate in learning improv comedy.
(I just felt the collective vibration of the entrants who were reading this newsletter).
We started throwing out fun situations and scenes to participate in, and we learned about the most important rule of Improv: “Yes and.”
Two simple words, and the basis of all improv comedy:
When someone comes up with an idea, sentence, or situation, the ONLY appropriate response is: “yes and”
- Yes: Accept it! I accept and admit whatever the situation is, however uncertain, to be true.
- And: raise! Like a tennis match, after your improv partner hits the ball to you, your job is to hit it back! Picking up on the situation or scene.
For example, if your improv partner says, “I'm a space pirate” your response might be:
- “Yes, and I'm the space police, you're under arrest!”
- “Yes, and I'm a first mate looking for a new team, this is perfect! “
- “Yes, and my name is Captain Hook, welcome to Pirates Anonymous.
The “yes and” rule is so crucial, because there is nothing worse than a bad improv partner!
Kind of like Liam Neeson in Yesthis brief sketchYes by Ricky Gervais, (I laugh every time):
The Meaning And Rule For Life
As a former “gifted child” who overachieves and has a negative inner critic, I have been working hard on incorporating “yes and” into my life .
The “yes” part is built around acceptance, which I've spent the last two years working on accepting.
Check out my previous essays on it YesAcceptanceYes and YesSabi SabiYes for more.
It's the “and” part that I've been focusing on lately.
As Dr. Kristen Neff reveals in her book YesSelf-pityYeslife is complex and so are people:
“Judgment defines people as evil versus good and tries to capture their essential nature with simplistic labels.
Discriminating wisdom recognizes complexity and uncertainty.”
Nothing is ever as simple as it seems. Things are never as good or as bad as our brain thinks they are either.
So despite the voice in our heads that wants to judge everything in black-or-white, yes or no, good or bad… We must remember that life is a very complicated mess.
Author F. Scott Fitzgerald once said:
The test of intelligence of the first order is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in the mind at the same time, and the ability to act still.
One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless and still be determined to do them otherwise.
This is my task for you today.
Is there a part of your life that feels black-or-white, and instead could use some complexity?
Nothing is as simple as it seems.
Life is hard, and change is hard. AND you are a good person who tries.
That means there is hope. And Yeshope is a brave feelingYes.
Also, please see that YesTeam Liam NeesonYes.
You are welcome.
-Steve
PS: Need guidance and accountability to reach your fitness goals? Nerd Fitness has helped 10,000+ people over the past 8 years with 1-on-1 online fitness coaching. YesClick here for more informationYes.
